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Sunday, September 27, 2009
i hatee
 Haa.. Im breaking dwn... it hurt so badly.. knaper la aku teringt pt dea.. In dz tym,he will owaes console me..always b w me.. I miss him..I need him..:''( He sud b texting me .. Its so hard 4 me.. it really2 sux.. so cold n quite.. empty..
NOw dat ure gone.. Behind my smile is a hurting heart.Behind my laugh,Im falling apart.Look closely at me and you will see,the person I am.. isnt me..
++ quoth Unknown at 12:37 AM Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Syed Muhd Saiful..
 Dear Diary.. Niari..22nd September 2009..1am.. Officially..Saiful da tgalkn aku..untuk selame-lamenyer.. :'''( aku kehlgan seseorg yg aku sesgt aku cintai dan kasihi..mule2 ibu..now him..ya allah.. Dis year has been really3 a challenging n tough year 4 me..mcm2 aku diuji..kawan,keluarge n saiful..haishh..4 a moment aku ingt aku n saiful ader peluang..4 a moment saiful berjaye menambat ati aku alek 4 ages dea cube..4 a moment aku terase saat2 aku bersame dea..4 a moment aku rase aku btl2 nk dea kembali..n now..dea tgalkn aku..aku tkle terime dgn pemergiaan dea..diam tanpe berite.. tibe2 mcm gni..saiful...:''( it really hurt to keep hurting u..haishh.. aku ingat lagi kate2 dea..all e poems.. knaper saiful uat suria mcm gni.. :'''( now.. i da tkder sape2 lgy 2 tell n share everytink n anythink w..no more me hearing bucuk2 muchi2 ranful n many more.. Bie.. sunyi bie..btl2 sunyi..now when everyone turn their back towards me.i da tkder tmpt g nk bergantong bie..i haf noone to turn to.. it hurt a lot pwecious.. u sorg yg btl2 knl i..secare zahir dan batin.. haiiiishh.. Lao i dpt penganti i tktao u.. U selalu dlm doa i.. I rindu u..I tk sangke u pergi dgn cpt u..our plans..e house..e rides..e holidays.. everytink.. All bout us kn? husby ingt dat song?? all e song dat we used to listen.hah..husby..aha..hiashhh..u la racun u la penawar i.. u.. tell me how 2 move on bie? I tao i blh..tpi susahh u.. 6 tahun u kte da knl..u tao kn? hw hard it is? Hw much u n i tried..n how much u n i keep coming back 2 ech other?? Its really impssible 4 us 2 b enemy kn?? e most jealousy..aha..cute. i loike e wae u feel jealous everytime d laki2 nk mtk knl2 nan i..ahha..i miss our gadoh over this.. how much u wud vent ur "anger" n sulked..n u juz cant helped it to pujok i alek..ahah..i miss all dat saiful..i reaally2 do..(if u were reading dis,i noe u wud b smiling lyk NOW n text me immediately n say weikz!! lolxs..haishh..nomre now) Now u n ibu tkder di sisi i..mcmner u? No more confess msges in e mid of 2-3am.no more cenyum2 n all dat..haishh saiful..u tell me how m i supposed to live my life?? Sailor n e sailing.. haissshh.. i tk pnh blg u date yg i tk pnh luper is 16,14,1 n now 22..how much i lyk 22 n it turned out 2 be diz bie..tradegy..Im really running into faded memories..U..i harap kite dpt bertemu di alam c2..u..tangisan bulan madu..mcmner cerite 2 mcm g2 la i rase tgh berlaku antare u n i..lyk how he treat his wife..is lyk exactly how ure treating me..pape pon keperitan hubungan kite nie..biarlah i simpan antare u dgn i.. I tktao u..susah..i miss everytink bout u..everytink lil things..haaa..saiful..knaper kite arus bertemu dan knper perpisahan kiter berakhir mcm gni? Seandainyer i dpt penganti..I wun fall 4 e bad guy..Nie kn u nk? u uro i jge2 ati2..biar dea jge i aik2 n u look frm far kn syg? dis is our promise kn? hiasshh..mcmner u..its so empty..i tktao lao i blh ker tk u.. i mtk maaf..maafkn segale kesalahan dan kesilapan i..halalkn mkn dan minum i..Ampun kn i saiful..I tk pena menyesal mengenali diri u..I bahagie teramat sgt.. Pemergiaan u btl2 sunyi..haishh..ya allah.. Moge roh u dicucuhi rahmat..Dan dekat disamping allah s.w.t..Ko akn sentiase didldm doaku..Assalamualaikum..
++ quoth Unknown at 2:15 AM Tuesday, September 15, 2009
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 *sigh* tempat nie la ku curahkn segala hasrat yg aku pendamkn.. Da lame tk update ehyk.. hidop2.. Saat nie. i just hope i can b by saiful syd.. Hes leaving me. Hes going..='( aku tkle bayang kn bagaimane raut wajah dea di saat nie.. Sume ader.. dorg tgh bce surah yassin.. Saiful tgh mengucap. .Ya allah.. Astafiruallazim.. Maaf kn aku.. Pemergiaan ibu,ayah n nw u.. AKu tk sanggop saiful. I miss ibu n u a lot. .Mase ibu meninggal,aku tk tao pape. .Haish ibu.. Suria da anggap ibu mcm ibu suria sendiri.. Suria syggg ibu.. Maafkan suria,hasrat ibu nk suria dan saiful hingge ke anak cucu tk kesampaian.. Ibu..Saiful is leaving me alone bu..Hes following you now bu.. It hurts me so much bu..I miss talking 2 u bu.. How much i 1 hu n kiss ur forehead ibu.. Su really miss u.. N nw,Saiful.. We all ne how much he has suffered.N hes 1 strong guy bu.. Suria tk pnh menyesal mengenal diri saiful.. Byk yg suria belajar dari dea.. iF he can live his lfe lyk other ppl,he will complete my life bu..Thanks ibu 4 giving me the second chance 2 b w him.. Suria tao cerite da lame berlalu. Suria tersentuh bu masih anggap suria as ur own daughter though suria halang pertunangan saiful dulu.. terime-kasih bu 4 everything.. I really love u lyk my own mother..I miss u 2 much bu.. I noe ibu tknk suria mcm gni.. Tapi suria rase soo hard 4 me 2 move on.. Now Saiful is leaving me.. Please dont take away saiful..Not now not till haish.. Ibu.. Saiful.. ayah.. ya allah..
++ quoth Unknown at 9:42 PM |
