♥♥ I'm his Miss Independent running into faded memories..♥♥

Thursday, June 25, 2009

1 persinggahan

Dear Diary,

Hari ini adalah kali terakhir untuk kami sume.. ya allah.. Nie sume betol2 ade la 1 persinggahan bagi diriku.. Ku tidak sangke nie sume harus terjadi.. Namun ku akur dengan suratan illahi.. Seandainyer dea adalah jodoh ku,kau tabahkan la iman ku.. Kuatkan semangat ku untuk tempohi nie sume...Ku benar2 mohon pade mu agar kau berikan ku kekuatan..seandainyer aku insan yg begitu lemah dan jahil..kau maha mengetahui dan kau la maha memahami.. begitu perit bagiku jikalau ku terpaksa ulangi sume ini sekali lagi.. Ya allah, aku begitu pasrah.. Maafkan la ku.. Kuatkan la semangatku ini.. Seandainyer dea adalah bagiku.. Kau kuatkan la semangat ku..

Pade pertama kali kita bertemu..Aku tidak tahu mengape aku boleh terjatuh hati kepadenyer.. Haha.. This is sooo funny.. Yet irony.. adui.. Ku tidak ingin sejarah berulang berkali-kali lagi.. Hes sooo full of mystery.. Soo engima 2 me.. I hate it, on the irony,i PRETTY2 LOVE IT! HuNy2.. Ure soo complicated @ time.. I hate it.. But i LOVE iT.. I really do.. Tapi aku tak tahu la.. Kadang kale hatiku mcm sakit gitu.. Especially tadi biler, aku nampak gambar dea.. Mcm sweet xey..

aDUI.. ku kecewe.. Haish.. Ya allah.. aku betol2 tidak kesampaian hati untuk berbuat gini kepada si dia.. Kerana ku tahu betapa perit rasanya.. 1 tamparan bagi diriku.. Ku rase seperti maruah ku tercabar..Bagaikan satu hinaan bagi diriku.. Betapa jijik nyer ku rasakan diriku pabila ku melihat apa yg ku tak sepatot ketahui.. Sakit atiku.. Sekali lagi,ku hanya insan biasa.. Ku tak salahkan si dia.. Si dia tak buat sebarang kesilapan kepada diriku malahan aku yg patot meminta maaf kepadanya.. Seandainya kehadiran ku, kemungkinan dia telah berubah hati.. Ku tidak pasti.. 1 kedaifan bagi diriku dan dia.. This is sooo complicated

1 Thing for sure, i dont want to prolong this agony.. Neither do i want to be kept in the lurch.. I dont want to stay in the dark.. Well nobody wants its.. Its awefull to be hide by the shadow.. It really is.. I dont want that.. None of us does.. I know i deserve better if this is the way.. I know and i believe i deserve better..

"LoVe takes oFf maSk

tHat we feaR We canNot LiVe

withOuT& kNOw

We caNnot live withIN"

++ quoth Unknown at 5:01 AM

Monday, June 15, 2009

Winter Moonlight

The snow, so peaceful and serene,caressed by the soft moonlight,gave magical feelings to the night.The soft blue glow,the lovers' words that then did flow,their lips closer and closeruntil, locked in the throesof a passionate embrace,he decided to express his feelings,to keep her safe.He whispered softly,his words like music to her ears,"I Love You,"and her response the same,heard like the gentle breeze,"And I, love you, forever."That was the night they promisedto be together through everything,each to care for the other when old and gray.A lovers' pactthe most likely to last.

- Krista J. Mikula -

++ quoth Unknown at 12:14 AM

Thursday, June 11, 2009

. . .

Dear Diary..
..

Its has been 4 2 daes since i withness the breathe-taking view of the night scene..gosh its so lovely..yesterday was the best..The sky,star n the full moon.. my2..finally i got 2 c it..Was hoping he wass der w me.. N wish there were a shooting star

Yesterday..i dont know what was w me..Suddenly my mind n soul wasnt @ ease.. Words eluded me. Felt it when i was working till i started weeping inside the bus.. Supposingly sud have gone home w em.. But i tld him i couldnt wait 4 me cux i wasnt feeling well..He look kinda dissapointed though.. If he only knew how i felt.. And then i weep.. My...i hate to feel dz way.. Occassionally it does happen to me.. But it seems that this year,ive encounter such feeling more than twice xey.. This is so simply insane.. My sentiments to be exact..ahah..

Faizal was sweet...despite the fact he know i was moody..He tried to cheer me up..haha..n wen i went 2 excuse myself,afta dat he asked haf u cried..hahh..concerned of him though.. n my cyg no1 2..xD

"LoVe takes oFf maSks tHat we feaR
We canNot LiVe withOuT
& kNOw
We caNnot live withIN."

++ quoth Unknown at 9:02 AM

Monday, June 8, 2009

Simply InSanity..

Dear Diary,

This is crazy.. It is getting so dman crazy.. i missing him lyk so much.. Silly me. how can i fell aslp wen he msg me just now?? damN.. i miss him.. I hate of feeling this way.. Im so distracted.. But I LOIKE IT. .I hate itSi much though. I love it even more.. hahak.. This is so simply insane!! xD

The other night, we sat and i was mesmerised by the view.. The sky,stars and e moon.. gosh.. Its sooo lovely.. He was next to me.. haaa.. Told him how i wish it was a full moon instead..wouldnt it be just perfect..Haha.. He laughed said count down for e next 15 daes..Imagine if i got to withness the view again.but with a full moon of cux. .It will be all just little too perfect.. heks.. Stop it HuNy.. DOnt overboard..

Take it slow. .RESIST.CONTROL.ENDURE.. U can do it!! JY2!! haha. .Itz true wad huda sae.. N i got to agree;
~~.CRUSH.LOVE.AFFECTION.~~

Dont wish to add pressure to it.. It will just worsen the outcome. So HUNY!!Juz relax n BREATHE.. haha. .Cant wait 4 him 2 come back! xD

LOTSA L♥Ve,
HuNy

"LoVe takes oFf maSks tHat we feaR
We canNot LiVe withOuT
& kNOw
We caNnot live withIN."

++ quoth Unknown at 2:08 AM

Sunday, June 7, 2009

The Meaning

To love is to share life together
to build special plans just for two
to work side by side
and then smile with pride
as one by one, dreams all come true.

To love is to help and encourage
with smiles and sincere words of praise
to take time to share
to listen and care
in tender, affectionate ways.

To love is to have someone special
one who you can always depend
to be there through the years
sharing laughter and tears
as a partner, a lover, a friend.

To love is to make special memories
of moments you love to recall
of all the good things
that sharing life brings
love is the greatest of all.

I've learned the full meaning
of sharing and caring
and having my dreams all come true;
I've learned the full meaning
of being in love
by being and loving with you.

- Kellie Spehn -

++ quoth Unknown at 8:18 PM

Changes..

Dear Diary,

Itz late i noe..i dont know wh m i still WIDE awake at this timing.. GOsh.. Erm.. U noe lately ive been coming back home late. .Well.. Pretty2 late i shall say.. Spend tym with him n em.. Hahas.its crazy. like seriously! N excuse me. Neva get back home till 430 am in the morning! itz was insane! Get back home,talked to him on the phone awhile. Afta that STRAIGHT went for a shower anD headed straight to school.. imagine how sleepy i was.. had a cup of coffee(black coffee) and red bull 4 just in-case purpose.heks.xP

It didnt stop there though. After school,met him! again! hahaha. he sooo CUTE!! cant believe that he watched me sleep when he suppose to do his work!! I was lyk super shocked when i woke up, he was staring n smiling @ me.. The way he smile.. *melts* heks. . I like it. The way he dot dot dot.. hahaha.xP N I MISS HIM!!!

He supposed to call me.He say he would.=( i waiting for his call. Well, looks like he is not gona called. Bet he was all too tired from yesterday.. Itz ok.. I understand.. Poor him.. Oh ya!! Did i told you that he actually bought for me lunch just now??!! I was SUPER SURPRISED! hahaha. But swwwweeettt n thoughtful of him! *loVe* dot dot dot. xP

The first time that we talked. The first time that we went home together. The first time that we met. The first time we haaa.. Its so nice.. Well initially,this is just the beginning.. Or slalu ckp baru2 sume nyer indah.. Nanti da lame2 aru kite tao.. well.. Huny not sure. Huny so CONFUSED!!

OK nak tahu naper? Bpa Huny da tawa ati.. Lao dea betol2 nak serious nan Huny..Den i will just wait. Wait for the time. Let nature take its course. . Ergh.. T dea going for a Holiday trip.. Im sooooo looking forward for the day that he come back frm his trip. . Cux frm there,then im positive that i will noe what he/"us" really mean.. Is he like the other soul or ...? Seriously i dont have any clue. .N seriously im soooo losing my self-esteem in bgr thingy.. Im afraid of falling again.. Itz thwarting..I dont wish to fall again.. Blue after we part..U noe that kind of feeling dont you? Im sure you do.. *sigh*

Only allah s.w.t saje yg tao isi ati aku ini..Bisikan disanubari ku.. Seandainyer dea la maha adil lagi maha memahami.. Kuatkan la iman ku.. Berikan la ku kekuatan untuk tempohi sume ini ya allah..Ku mohon.. Amin..

Lotsa L♥Ve,
HuNy

"LiFe waS Beautiful tHen
I remember tHat tiMe
I knew wHat waS
HAPPINESS..
Let tHe meMory LiVe aGaiN"

++ quoth Unknown at 3:01 AM

Monday, June 1, 2009

Speak of the heart

Hur..i miss him.. i dont y..this is SOOO killing me..argh.i hate 2 feel this way..keep me hanging.. I hate it BUT i love it.haha! it sound complicated. but i juz love it.This is soo me!!heks. . If he know how 2 play his game n lodge his card well, he might just take me away..weeee!!!Keep me guessing n coming back 4 more. I LOIKE!!! hahah..

BUT then again.. Im so SICK N TIRED of getting hurt over n over AGAIN!! mcm da tkder harapan gitu... But i feel something is missing.. i dont know what it is..but it just feel something is missing.. N i can sense something great is gonna happen 2 me.. I dont know what exactly it is.But i just have the feeling that "he" is nearby..If only i met him.he will be e 1 dat abah tld me.. erhhhh...e guy dat ive been waitin n longing 4!!! sape ehyk! Huny lyk so confused rite now.. gosh. .

" Behind my smile is a hurting heart.Behind my laugh,Im falling apart.Look closely at me and you will see,the person I am.. isnt me..Im longing 4 his presence.."

"Life was Beautiful tHen
I rememBeR that tiMe
I knew wHat waS
HAPPINESS
lET THE MEMORY LIVE AGAIN..."

++ quoth Unknown at 2:59 PM

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